Monday, July 1, 2013

Doubt revealed.

We separated ourselves from the men who remained seated in the kitchen discussing that which held common ground. Overhearing topics of work, hiking, and Jesus, I sat in the confirmation that God was orchestrating a sweet song of new friendships.

Being a God of relationship, the understanding of that relationship played out is something you learn through those who are already captivated by His great love.

In the beginning months of our marriage we attended a church where our first friendships of Christ began. Standing in line at the in-house coffee shop, the big guy and I were approached by a couple with similar attributes for our season of life; both young, no children, he was tall, she was active, their spirits radiated sincerity and truth. The underlining desire for a relationship which encompassed God was met with joy! The next years were made of laughter, tears, babies, and above all, life in Him with them.

The final evening of our time living close left us all in a pool of thanksgiving and heart break. Our dearest friends that we had done life with were moving back home, and it felt as if they were taking a piece of us with them. Though separated by miles, our love still remains intact and full.

In the years time it has been since they moved, our loneliness for God centered relationships has been daunting. Now sitting across from a woman who radiates Christ I eased into the sofa, being washed over with the blessed assurance of His love for me. 

She asked me about where I had been and how I had come to where I am.

We exchanged stories--the tip of the ice berg version, as she called it.

When conversation led to those in our life, or perhaps since passed by from earlier years, I spoke of the doubt I had; watching people I once knew trapped in the world were I once lived.

Without recognizing the hope I had lost, she broke my sentence.

You don't know that!

As if being caught stealing something of worth, her words slapped me across the face.

But..she stopped me before the continued doubt could roll off my tongue.

God can reach them in the midst of disaster just as He did for you and I!

She continued on, I have family that have been brought to Christ because they saw my life and said, "If it can happen to her then it can happen for me!" Do not underestimate the Power of God.

My mind hung on her words, hung on the cliff I had pushed myself over--by a finger I hung.

Our time continued, moving forward in the get-to-know-you talk. Discovering similarities, enjoying what seemed for both of us, the first time in a long time that small talk could be had with God in the midst.

As we said our goodbyes, my mind still hung.

My life is living proof of what God can do. My husband is living proof of what God can do. And so it continues on with my parents and many others. God saved us all from the depths of hell and yet I unconsciously have let the doubt that He can do the same for everyone take captive a part of my heart.

It was a beautiful weekend of saving grace.

Perhaps a new season is in bloom where we live.

New friends, less doubt, more rest.

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